March 7, 2010 - Tempe, Arizona

It rained today, as it only can rain in the desert, full of rosemary and sage and dust. Lightning eventually, but to begin with, just the hammering of large raindrops that deceive you into thinking you can dodge between them.

Worship today was nice. I didn't see anyone that I remembered from my old church - not that this is surprising after 20+ years. It made the experience a little less surreal. The pastor was preaching a series on miracles, and today he was talking about Jesus and Peter walking on the water. The pastor did a good job communicating his thoughts. Very real and present, not scripted, not sounding like an automaton reciting memorized points. He focused mostly on how God the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit call us as followers of Christ out of our comfort zones, how God seeks to disturb our quiet cocoons of familiarity that can all too easily become tombs. Jesus called Peter to take a crazy step of faith, and Peter's life was undoubted forever changed in that process, as ours can and should be.

It's all very true. But I found myself as I often do when listening to other preachers, holding the text up and twisting and turning it, allowing the thoughts of the preacher to be refracted and tweaked and reflected back in different directions, perhaps. Not a negative comment on the person preaching - they are valuable in providing me with a direction to begin working from.

This morning, as I thought over the account, I wandered down different paths. Peter comes up with this bizarre test of Jesus' identity as Jesus approached them across the water. He asks Jesus to tell him to meet Him on the water. Jesus obliges. Peter obeys. Peter begins to sink. Jesus saves him and admonishes him for his lack of faith.

Peter was more than willing to be disturbed. He was more than willing to step out of his comfort zone. His request seems almost insane. Why not just ask Jesus a simpler question to validate His identity? Peter - always the brash one - is not content with anything but the most wholehearted of commitments.

Yet he fails. He sinks. It isn't whether or not Peter is disturbed that matters. The result is inevitably the same. On our own, we sink. We fail. And whether we are disturbed or not the overwhelming sufficiency of Jesus' grace and strength and mercy are what carries us through, what buoys us up and lifts us over the waves that topple us and would drown us otherwise. Whether we succeed or fail, whether we live or die - it is only by the grace of God.

This afternoon was another gathering with the cousins and family to observe my mother-in-law's birthday. A raucous but enjoyable afternoon, followed by a more subdued evening due to tired out kiddos. Gena and I are trying to figure out the complexities of packing for a two and a half day interview with a congregation in the Seattle area. We're excited, but also hesitant to allow our excitement get the better of us. More is at play than just us. More than just this other congregation and pastor and us. We want what is best not just for us, but for them as well. Good things seem to be happening with the congregation. We pray that such things continue - whether we can help contribute to it or not. Keep us in your prayers as we fly up and engage in these discussions.